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Almost Famous 10/15/2013

It is with great pleasure that JackColton.com and Pure Nightclub join forces on Tuesday, October 15th 2013 to honor Las Vegas nightlife’s latest crop of rising stars. These men and women are climbing the ladder of notoriety at a record pace, are frequently seen yammering it up at the best local’s parties and will undoubtedly continue to do great things in the nightlife industry.

Check their ‘completely true’ biographies below and join them in celebration at Pure Nightclub on 10/15/2013.

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Joseph Gettright – Joseph is one of the only DJs who is able to seamlessly spin the music for a party while eating a full meal with chopsticks.  Known for his gigantic smile, cutoff shirts, and fascination with the praying mantis, Mr. Gettright has a bright future in both Las Vegas and Los Angeles.

Matt Duda – Legend has it that Matt whittled his cane from a piece of sweet mahogany in a single week.  He now uses this iconic staff for self protection from cougars, as an oversized musical flute, and as a putter while on the golf course.  With his US Navy background in the culinary arts, he plans to open a 24 hour donuts, pizza, and massage parlor on Spring Mountain.

Misty Rose – Her initial passion, and beginning career path, began in the pursuance of a professional karaoke career.  Her steadfast mission to become ranked in the top ten in the US came to a screeching halt during a competition at the Ellis Island Hotel & Casino here in Las Vegas.  During a freak accident she dislocated her voice box.  While her path had changed, she has earned a spot as one of the city’s rising stars.

Andres Mazo – This man’s simple start began when he saved Almaza Hookah Lounge from a devilish arson attempt.  From there his reputation exploded as he singlehandedly is responsible for starting the trend of men wearing tight red pants in social settings.  A strong partygoer, and true gentlemen, Andres is the definition of Almost Famous.

Ben Brownback – Ben represents a sort of wild card in this list of standout Las Vegas personnel.  Within a span of a few hours spent with Mr. Brownback, one could easily drink fine champagne from the bottle, experience shots of Grand Marnier, indulge in the finest cigars, and ultimately end up receiving a piano lesson.  He is one of the most passionate people we’ve seen toward his family and friends, and highly deserves to be on this list.

Char Modelle – Char Modelle’s initial success began when she earned seven straight southern Nevada defensive driving merits; an achievement that doubled the previous record.  Taking with her the skills learned from accident free driving, her great looks and ability to work a ridiculous amount of jobs in a single week took over.  She still holds the lowest insurance rates in the state.

Kid Conrad – Being a dual threat nominee in this list, Mr. Conrad has had much long term success as a disc jockey in Las Vegas.  Unbeknown to most, he is also a volunteer firefighter.  No matter how strenuous his schedule may get, KC always meets his commitments to Station 42.

Julie Meka – A waitress that has been shooting up the ranks at the Light Group, Julie took the summer scene by storm by absolutely owning Bare Pool.  Her Instagram photos alone drove a total of 10% of the summer’s revenue.  Looking forward, Julie hopes to start a web miniseries themed around roommate scaring.

Vishal Mathur – Vishal V-city Mathur has a passion for family, Jordans, and dealing oxygen.  He represents one of the most genuine people in Las Vegas.  In 5 years he envisions himself conquering the oxygen market and moving into the market of more exotic elements like thallium, radon, and arsenic.

Anthony Delacruz – Between his rigorous schedule as the Food & Beverage manager for Tao Group, Anthony runs an underground spider fighting ring.  While this scene is small across the US, it remains a booming business in Asia.  Some of his most recent epic battles have matched arachnids from different classes, and all battles can be viewed on Skype.  With his reigning champion, a trapdoor spider named Ocho, he plans to use his next vacation to try his luck in the Laos fighting circuit.

Wendy Macias – She is a definite up and comer at Hakkasan nightclub, and recently took the bronze in the 2013 waitress Olympics in the sprint and champagne pour event.  On the side, she has been working on a previously secret project that involves the creation of low calorie, and vitamin infused, edible panties.

Alana Esuerra – Alana has always been intrigued by first impressions, and over the years has been perfecting her ‘BS’ detector.  She has plans to write a book depicting her findings in the field, in hopes of creating a self-help guide on how to conquer introductory experiences.  She also enjoys giving cat massages.

Lisa  Baldassarre – Lisa hails from the great northwest where she grew up working on a radish farm.  During her farming upbringing she developed her strong will, great biceps, and passion to escape the farm.  She has always been fond of mustaches, pushup bras, and the beaches of Miami.

True Love –  After coming in at a disappointing 3rd place on ABC’s The Bachelorette, DJ True Love decided to give his heart to a higher cause.  Realizing how many e-mails and failed love connections that the ladies of Las Vegas were getting in their efforts for online matrimony, he is now the #3 consultant in Vegas for Match.com. And to hedge his bets, he decided to grow his own roses.

Charity Faith –  After her instant stardom from her viral YouTube video: Queen Bees and Bottle Rat Dreams, Charity Faith quit her job and began traveling the world as an internet celebrity. After a heated battle with Tosh.O producers who felt she needed a web redemption (she still to this day argues her video was a success), Charity moved back to Las Vegas and opened up her own online consulting firm.

Sam Glaser –  While most people know him as the creative director for TLC’s What Not To Wear, Sam also has a talent for crafting some of New York’s top designs out of 1OAK’s lost and found bin.  Disclaimer:  Any previously owned garment that is recognized on the runway can and will be used against you via Twitter.

Kwame Tull – Most people don’t know that Kwame comes from Barbados, and is second cousins with the one and only Rhianna.  Outside of duties his at Gold Lounge, and being a nightlife socialite, Kwame is working on a set of graphic novels due out in July.  These visual scriptures are entitled The Turnt Up Chronicles, and the first series has volumes entitled All The Way Up, The Turnt Up Is Real , and The Turnt Up Continues.

Stephanie Williams – Stephanie is well known for never turning down a good time, a dress-up party, or a great pizza.  After the last year, her Klout score has almost doubled, and is only part of the reason she is nominated.  The other reason is because she never needs a chaser after shots.

Nat De Leon – A world traveler by heart, Nat’s always looking for the next adventure.  From hang gliding in the Andes, ostrich racing in Botswana, to roller derby in Hungary, she has never turned a challenge down.  Her side boob is also rated in the top 50 in Las Vegas.

Kara Ackerman – Has been aggressively climbing the ranks with her expertise on diamonds and other rare gemstones.  What began as a simple personal lust for jewelry, turned into scholarly passion.  All karats Zales, Jared, and other leading jewelry brands have been pursuing her over the last 8 months; however, she plans on opening her own branch of stores called Nerats that deals only in blood and urine diamonds.

Dominic Ritzter – Dominic has a natural talent for marketing that began at a young age.  As an adolescent he wrote letters to Topps suggesting ways to better brand their baseball cards, and ended up saving the company.  From there he worked with Walmart corporate, but after ending up in an embarrassing photo on PeopleOfWalmart.com, he was forced to resign.  Luckily his skills were unmatched, and his illustrious career was headed for Las Vegas.

Kira Benzel – The first individuals who left Montana to conquer Las Vegas had left an immeasurable impact on the city.  When Kira arrived, the expectations having already been laid out for her were pretty damn high. As is common with Montanans, they like eating cabbage, trapping beaver, and meeting expectations.  While Kira despises cabbage, she is amazing at getting her hands on some beaver, and has done nothing short of meet and exceed all expectations.

Jordan Nolan – Jordan has been the envy of most females that she meets due to the fact that she doesn’t need fake eyelashes.  While it is becoming more common to find girls fretting over these fake accessories, Jordan’s naturally long and lushes lashes never need any extracurricular attention or additions.  Her great looks, beaming personality, and stunning lashes have treated her well at Hakkasan, and more recently assisted in her engagement.

Michael Sartain – Michael experienced a very rough childhood due to the fact that his body rejected his initial polio vaccination.  At age 5 he ended up contracting the disease, but due to his strong will and the nature of his character, he naturally beat the disease.  He has taken this polio fighting strength with him into adulthood, and at times his business determination is unmatched.  Randomly enough, he came up with the name for his current company after being inspired by Livin’ La Vida Loca.

Yoshi Lahn – After a lifetime of laughing off comparisons to Mario Brothers characters and having to combatively fight off requests for rides from creepy plumbers, Yoshi found his passion in extreme martial arts and is now a level 10 black belt. With skills like these, we can only assume he will soon find his princess.

Josh Lang – His entry into the world of nightlife began after an accidental late night text message for love was mistaken as an eager opportunity to change careers. We aren’t sure what the original message said, but they read it as “I want to stick myself into your hosting team so hard until your sales spill over onto next year’s balance sheet.” And like a stork delivering good news, a successful career was born.

Adriana Carillo –  After working back home as a duckling bather,  Adriana decided it was time for a change and moved to Sin City looking for a job to fulfill her passion for orange Gatorade and loud toga parties.   She became insanely successful after becoming a DJ for house pet parties.  Her most recent appearance was at Katy Perry’s cat’s 12th birthday party in Malibu.

Spencer Cagle –  After writing one of New York’s best selling books, ‘The Vegas Cocktail Mattress,” Spencer rose straight to the top becoming one of nightlife’s best hosts, earning him the name Cagle Guy.  When he’s not doing kegal exercises he likes to crochet slippers and donating them to the barefoot tourist girls walking around casinos.

Madd Maxx –  Many don’t know this, but Madd Maxx is the writer for Cards Against Humanity.  His witty yet offensive creativity has got him almost arrested, punched in the face, asked to a threesome, and had someone name their first born after him.  This of course was because Maxx acted out all his cards out before they went to print.

Jarrett Applewhite – Jarrett’s near death experience at Disney’s Peter Pan ride left Jarrett unable to ever wear the color green ever again.  To this day he hoards vials of pixy dust in his home to in order to sleep at night.

Casey Jade – Between grooming overweight hairy men and making instruments out of old grey goose bottles, Casey enjoys making homemade holograms of all of her ex boyfriends and mailing them to Santa Claus every year hoping to reignite an old flame.

ALMOSTFAMOUS

 

 

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